Hagan Blount

PlaceInvaders TableTalk Newsletter // January 19, 2018

Hagan Blount
PlaceInvaders TableTalk Newsletter // January 19, 2018

This fuckin’ guy

You’ve seen him every time you opened your browser window, or is it just us and our moms? Apparently he knows Satoshi, as if you are somehow blessed with information on this secretive person/cadre as you buy more ads hocking your $2,000/year email subscription service. The cognitive dissonance of our issues with this weirdo and the fact that we’re now part of his marketing machine is not lost on us. The ads must be working.

Amazon cancels a bunch of shows because data

Nielsen ratings are so passé. Now, they have downloads, minutes watched, ads served, and countless other metrics to gauge how profits are turned. Next big play: content with demonstrated mass-market appeal, like spin-offs, reboots, a Lord of the Rings TV show (seriously), probably that Jake guy when Youtube drops him (don’t put a move like that past Bezos). Moral of the story: don’t fall in love with a TV show and expect it to be around for seven seasons anymore, that would be a unicorn.

Some real talk about this Aziz thing

Grace didn’t get straight-up raped so everyone is mad at her. No one knew what Babe.net was and now they do. It didn’t come to them, Babe sought out the story. The writer of the story responded in a not-so-pleasant way to an accomplished news anchor. None of those things mean that this screwed-up dating situation in America isn’t something we all need to address. This wasn’t a fun fling, it was an attempted notch on the bedpost. No one should expect this kind of treatment on a date, and it’s our duty to make sure the #metoo movement includes instructing the young men (well, all men) of the world that this type of uncomfortable, overly aggressive, not-so-consensual sexual encounter is not OK.

Dark matter, or is it?

If you’re into space exploration, there are a lot of problems out there that confound scientists - like that we’ll never be able to explore the entire universe (without complete control of space time), or how we’ll never be able to see what’s beyond our universe, and that there may be other universes (saved you a google). The dark matter problem is one that I have trouble believing in. We don’t know exactly how gravity works, but many claim that the explanation for how the universe is held together is by dark matter and dark energy. We’re waiting for the proof, until then, expect to hear about dark matter until its Copernicus comes along.

We literally love this

Are you going to raise a glass and cheers? Do you wait on line? Do you know how to beg the question or comprise anything? Did you see that clickbait video claiming how we’re all racists if we ask instead of axing questions that the goddamned ATLANTIC reposted to their Facebook feed (honestly, Atlantic - you’re better than this). Literally now literally means figuratively, and we can't help but become more annoyed by the indifference to this millennification of American English. Can you just not wait for the day when sloppy, ignorant English completely engulfs the American lexicon? One East Village bar isn’t having any of that, and the next time we’re in NYC, we’re actually/definitely/positively going to get a drink there.